Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Kindness, respect, manners and losing my cool

i'm basically a very nice person. I'm generally even tempered, pleasant, smile easily and naturally, and was steeped in hospitality so long it dyed my character permanently.

I look for the best in people. I'm quick to write off someone's crankiness or rudeness to the difficulty of their day. I was taught that this was what reasonable adults did, that this was expected behavior, that it was simply professional. Somewhere along the line, the expectations changed, but no one notified me. I'm sick of it.

I'm seriously beginning to wonder if people respond to niceness at all anymore other than seeing it as an opportunity to take advantage of people. I don't understand why people prefer irritability and aggravation over simple good manners and cooperation. Do people want stress and drama in their lives? Are Tylenol and Tums so enjoyable that people seek out headaches and heartburn to have an excuse to pop them?

I'm tired and I've had a long day, and I need to shake these things off. To the woman who said I didn't get something initiated, please, I've got it documented. If you forgot or just got busy, I'll take that a lot better than trying to make me look bad. To the man who ignored my requests for verification of service rendered but responded to the male I'm helping train, screw you, you sexist jerk. To the other man who didn't respond until I was obviously angry, just what is up? Do you get off on being told off by an angry woman? Well, that's just not my thing.

I spend far too much time at work for it to be a miserable endeavor where I have to be a heinous nightmare. There are a ton of businesses out there who provide the services my company needs, and I will guarantee that the company who makes working with them a pleasant experience is going to get more consideration when we're choosing venders. One of the points of etiquette is making our daily interactions with people smoother. Good manners are not some quaint relic of a more formal time. They're the engine oil of society, and they're just good business.

etiquette, manners, business


Blogger Lisa :-] said...

It would be so nice if this were just the rant of a tired woman fed up with a couple of bad incidents of one day. Unfortunately, I see it as a pretty accurate assessment of where our society has gone when it comes to manners. Politeness, consideration, and just plain human decency are decidedly out of style. It makes being a small business person that much more of a pleasure. Let's take over some remote island and create our own utopia and leave all the %$*&##@'s behind... :P

February 13, 2007 5:46 AM  
Blogger Nelle said...

I see this all the time. If you ask for something nicely you are ignored. If you yell (which I almost never do) you get rewarded, thus reinforcing this behavior.
"The squeaky wheel gets the oil."

February 14, 2007 12:59 PM  
Blogger Shelina said...

I feel for you Cynthia. I am having troubles at work too - with someone who believes CYA has to do with placing the blame on someone else - rather than learning, avoiding mistakes.

February 16, 2007 7:58 PM  

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