Sunday, January 01, 2006

Here on the pulse of this new day
You may have the grace to look up and out
And into your sister's eyes, into
Your brother's face, your country
And say simply
Very simply
With hope
Good morning.
(excerpt from
Inaugural Poem by Maya Angelou.)

I love new beginnings. I've had a lot of them. There's nothing like that feeling of beginning fresh and clean as if you've just stepped from the shower or the confessional. That feeling is just an illusion we create for ourselves though. We never really get rid of our history, and trying to do so usually creates more problems than it solves. It's a good illusion though, a hopeful one, and at its heart, a truthful illusion. Each moment we have is brand new and filled with choices.

We stand at the beginning of a New Year. The last one has been tumultuous. We've reeled from the power of earth and atmosphere. We've seen some of the best and worst in humanity. Like so many others, I'm glad 2004 is over. Yet I know, that the demarcation between this fresh, blank sheet of a year ahead of us, and the wrinkled, scribbled on, crossed out, tear stained page of a year behind us is just the construct of man. This is just another day.

For most of my adult life, I've been one to create goals, plans and agendas as the practical response to needs. That ability seems beyond my capabilities right now. I don't trust my vision to see too far into the future or my ability to create something that can come to fruition months or years down the road. So, no resolutions for me this year. I've recently recovered the ability to hope, to wish, to dream, even to imagine. Those are seeds I carry with me. Where and how I'll plant them is something I'll look forward to seeing. I have this moment. I have this day. What I do with it is who I am.

The piece above is what I wrote on New Year's Day of last year. I think it's some of the best writing I did all year, and I wanted to post it here. In the last year, I recovered some ability to plan. My ability to dream and envision a better life for myself grew. I'm proud, most of all, that my ability to act grew. As introspective as I've been, I live less in my head now. I do more at the same time I appreciate being more. For that alone I can look at 2005 with peace of mind. I look forward to 2006 with no resolutions though. Those moments are all we have, and I hope we fill them all with the rich, vibrant, sometime complicated, often glorious choices of living life well.

7 Comments:

Blogger Wenda said...

Here's to creating new beginnings in the middle of it all and to making the most of our lives and illusions.

January 01, 2006 5:25 AM  
Blogger Gannet Girl said...

That IS a wonderful essay, and so is the last paragraph addition. Happy New Year!

January 01, 2006 8:02 AM  
Blogger Laurie said...

Yes, this year has been one for new beginnings for me, too. It's been frightening and exhilerating at the same time. I hope the new year brings you all you wish for.

January 01, 2006 8:43 AM  
Blogger Solitary Dancer said...

Yep, here were are on the threshold of a new beginning.

I'm looking forward to the journey.

January 01, 2006 9:31 AM  
Blogger Lisa :-] said...

No resolutions this year for me, either.

Wonderful, wise writing Cynthia...and worth repeating.

January 01, 2006 11:06 AM  
Blogger ChasingMoksha said...

Yes doing is a very good thing. Sometimes we can get caught up in the thought way too much.

Great writing as always, ----I can only aspire to be so.


Have a Happy and productive NEW YEAR!

January 01, 2006 8:26 PM  
Blogger Tammy said...

Here Here! Congrats on your personal growth and may this year bring you joy!

January 03, 2006 3:15 PM  

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