Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Slogging through

This is my one full day off this week, and I've spent most of it either crying or fighting back tears. Tomorrow would be my husband's 50th birthday. What is the proper tense form for that sentence? It still is his birthday even if he's not around anymore. I have to focus on drivel like that to keep the tears in check and my chin up.

It's one more milestone he won't see and we won't share. It's a pretty big milestone. Maybe that's why it's getting to me so bad.

This is one of the things that's just so horrible about grief. You get better, and then something like a birthday makes it so sharp all over again.

5 Comments:

Blogger Songbird said...

(((Cynthia)))

August 19, 2009 12:17 AM  
Blogger Gannet Girl said...

It IS his 50th birthday.

Lotta this going around right now -- take a look at the most recent post on Quantum Theology.

It's the Lovely Daughter's birthday today. How lovely to know that she and your husband share a day.

Love you.

August 19, 2009 6:34 AM  
Anonymous Karen Johnson said...

I know that grief, too. Monday was my son's would-be 30th. It really hurts and it's surprising it hurts so deeply. Another reminder of lost dreams and the presence of one we cherish so much. My heart and thoughts and prayers are with you as you take on the unavoidable blow of this sad day.
Hugs and comfort, Karen

August 19, 2009 8:50 AM  
Blogger Theresa Williams said...

These kind of days are so tough. Love you.

August 19, 2009 1:00 PM  
Blogger Lisa :-] said...

Keep your eyes open. Perhaps he'll send you something to warm your heart and dry your tears...

August 19, 2009 1:48 PM  

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