I found this at Judi's, and she found it at Theresa's, and I just couldn't resist. The challenge was to google "unfortunately, (your name)" and post the first ten non-repetitive results. I confess, I cheated. I went for the fun results, and it did give me a rather dark giggle. I italicized my favorites and saved the best for last.
Unfortunately, Cynthia cannot afford the health care necessary
Unfortunately, Cynthia's life isn't going as well.
Unfortunately, Cynthia didn’t seem to get her points across very well
Unfortunately Cynthia’s dream soon became a nightmare
Unfortunately Cynthia was not there to accept her award.
Unfortunately, Cynthia became the 'butt' of our jokes
Unfortunately, Cynthia's case is nether extreme nor uncommon
Unfortunately, Cynthia has been kidnapped by the Hungarian mafia
Unfortunately, Cynthia didn’t divulge any sex tidbits.
unfortunately Cynthia is currently plotting her comeback.