Where's my beret?
Tonight, none of the shows I had queued suited my mood, and I thought it was too late for a movie, so I went browsing to see just what TV shows they had. There it was, The Mary Tyler Moore Show. Oh, I loved that show back in the seventies when it was first on, from Mary's Evan Picone wardrobe (I still remember and miss my first Evan Picone suit, this wonderful gray that sneered at the idea that a gray suit wasn't sexy) to the well developed characters to that theme song.
If you're old enough to remember, sing along, Who can turn the world on with her smile...
Decades later, I find I still love that show. The writing has held up, and damn it, I still want to turn the world on, and despite all the crap I'm still smiling. OK, this comes from severe, strict early childhood training that you smiled through everything. I've smiled until my face hurt, and I had to massage my cheeks to stop smiling. I've smiled and made jokes while being loaded onto an ambulance. I scoff at beauty pageant contestants who have to resort to Vaseline on their teeth. Amateurs.
When I was watching tonight, I heard more then the opening line of the song. These lyrics got to me. How will you make it on your own? This world is awfully big, girl, this time you're on your own. But it's time you started living. It's time you let someone else do the the giving. Well, damn. Decades, wrinkles, gray hair and a no longer fabulous, no longer designer wardrobe later, I'm living that damn theme song.
I am going to effing make it after all. I may be alone. I may be starting a career all over again in the worst economy our country has seen in generations. I have the right to be scared and to feel really lousy about my life sometimes. I also have the courage and the grit to keep smiling while I recreate my life with grace, humor, style and substance.
I have a beret somewhere. It's a cute little black knit. I need to find it just so I can toss it in the air. Y'all had better be smiling when I do.