Appearances

I had a three hour job interview today, and it looks like I'll get a second interview with the company sometime next week. Between that and this unrelenting heat, I bear an unusually strong resemblance to old pudding right now. My makeup, which looked spectacular in the bathroom when I was getting dressed, may have lasted until I pulled out of my driveway. In the business' parking lot, I was wiping away little mascara smears from beneath my eyes, blotting sweat off my forehead and wondering my lipstick and blush went. I don't think you could see that the roots of my hair were soaking wet, but they were.

Interview dressing is always hard this time of year. If I wear a dress, I feel like I ought to wear pantyhose, and pantyhose on a 105 degree, 111 heat index afternoon is just a really stupid idea. It ranks up there with "let's stick a fork in this outlet and see what happens" on the stupidity scale. If I wear pants without a jacket, I run the risk of underdressing for the kind of job that I want. A jacket in August in the south potentially means upping how much body odor you're emitting, and that's not exactly the impression I want to leave behind me. "Yeah, you remember her, that big, fat stinky lady."

Business attire has changed so much that what's appropriate for one office is totally out of line for another and way too stuffy for yet another. My current job calls for a very corporate dress code. With my weight loss, that's been very hard. I've pretty much alternated three blouses, two shirt/jackets, three t-shirts and two sleeveless scoop neck shells that could double as top or vest over two pair of pants and two skirts for the last three months. My clothes are boring. I've lost enough weight for them to not really fit anymore, yet common sense says, I need to hold onto them until I'm more securely in the next lower size.

As I've lost weight, when I've bought clothing, I've had several goals. It had to accomodate my changing size, meaning elastic and spandex cleverly woven into the cotton so it would still look natural. It had to be comparatively inexpensive. I've seen no point in paying full price for something I could only wear a few months and that wouldn't fit right for part of them. It had to work within a limited color palette so I could mix and match. In the winter, black, white, pink and gray dominated. For summer, khaki and lime green (along with my neutrals) rule. Again, so I could interchange pieces easily, everything had to have a fairly clean and classic line.

That's all well and good, and very practical, but it's meant that absolutely nothing in my wardrobe stands out. I feel frumpy again. I want one spectacular piece -- something that when I slip it on, I immediately feel bold, sexy, smart and distinctive, yeah, something that makes me feel like me. I started losing weight again to regain my health, but you know, I'm regaining my looks as well. It's time I started enjoying that too.

Well, it will be, at least, when this heat breaks.

summer, heat, clothing