Sunday, May 27, 2007


I don't do simple well. I do tangents, one little thing leads to another and to another and to another, and everyone one of them feels important to know, a potentially useful bit of information that might even be critical. Even a simple breath can trigger my mind into thinking of the complexity of the mechanics of breathing, of alveoli, tars and nicotines, of invisible gases and strange powders, of teenage auto-erotic asphyxiation games and post-stroke minutes of brain oxygen deprivation, of CPAPS and antihistamines. Exhale on the power stroke. Inhale as you release. What should be an automatic process becomes a mind whirling spin that leaves me wanting to shout, STOP, STOP, STOP! We have to know so much.

I wish I did simple well, but it's too hard. Not even a turkey sandwich is simple anymore. White, wheat, multi-grain, rye, sourdough, pita, tortilla? Honey baked, grilled, fried, creole seasoned? Free range, hormone free? Mayo? Mustard? Ranch? Chipotle? Wasabi? Oh, I don't even want to get started on the cheeses or veggies. So many choices.

I start with simple in mind. I want to eschew excess and stick to the essentials of life. I want biscuits and honey but end up with a breakfast casserole. I'll hang one picture on the wall to let the negative space enhance its beauty but eventually make a grouping of painting, flowers, candles and decorative plate. I don't know when to leave well enough alone. I get overwhelmed by so many things.

I want to shake myself like a furry dog fresh from a bath and let the clutter fly off of me. I want to close my eyes and see black. I want to inhale and feel nothing more than my stomach rise. Simple is something that I want to relearn.

This entry prompted by Sunday Scribblings.



Blogger more cows than people said...

Amen, again. I resonate with your thinking (at least the thinking you post here) so often!

May 27, 2007 6:04 PM  
Blogger Nelle said...

I once tried to meditate and could not turn my thoughts off long enough to feel the silence that I was looking to achieve. Now, I am better than I was and at times I can clear my head, but it doesn't last for long.

May 28, 2007 8:46 AM  
Blogger Crafty Green Poet said...

I like your image of shaking yourself like a dog fresh from a bath to let the clutter fly off! I know the feeling too!

May 28, 2007 3:00 PM  
Anonymous laura said...

::chuckle:: The last time I closed my eyes and tried to meditate I got lost in the blood vessels passing through my eyelids, watching the blood course through, thinking about the wonders of the human body and then, from there things just WHIZ BANG took off... LOL No wonder the Lunesta isn't working for me! Simple is SO DANG HARD!

May 28, 2007 5:39 PM  
Blogger alphawoman said...

Good piece of prose!

May 29, 2007 7:40 AM  

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